funny doctor office stories

Share 1 Facebook Tweet. Patient: Hi, I just had an autopsy. —Sources: gmrtranscription.com; nursebuff.com. However, that doesn't mean all doctors have to be serious all the time. Answers: 1) Macular degeneration; 2) Salmonella; 3) Spinal meningitis; 4) Fibroids of the uterus, Sources: overheardintheoffice.com; notalwaysright.com; reader Evelyn Rosemore, Plano, Texas; Scrubs magazine. NewsX . We have to endure periods, crazy hormones, pregnancy and menopause to name a few. Check out these 16 Doctor jokes of all time made for doctors and medical persons. Read on these relatable funny medical jokes. Didn’t your doctor tell you about it?”, She rechecked the orders. “Well, I told him a hundred times to go see my doctor.”, “Good? December 30, 2020 December 30, 2020. —Source: sunnyskyz.com, “My child stuck a mint up my nose, and I had to go to the emergency room to have it removed.”. We had decided to do some shopping at the mall, well, really mostly window shopping. by Caroline Kee. I arrived at my doctor's office for a routine physical and everything was going fine. By Reader's Digest Editors, RD.com Updated: Aug. 06, 2019. An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was, and she told him her story. We recommend our users to update the browser. “What’s going on here? Discharge status: alive but without permission. “Ah, Dr. Jones, a meeting of the minds,” he said, laughing it off. —Source: notalwaysright.com. To paraphrase Mark Twain: Be careful of medical transcripts; you may die of a misprint. This is a list of fictional doctors (characters that use the appellation "doctor", medical and otherwise), from literature, films, television, and other media.. Shakespeare created a doctor in his play Macbeth (c 1603) with a "great many good doctors" having appeared in literature by the 1890s and, in the early 1900s, the "rage for novel characters" included a number of "lady doctors". Patient: I’m sorry to have so many questions. 1 / 3. —Murray Grossan, MD, founder of the Grossan Institute, Los Angeles. From hilariously misinformed patients to doctors with a wickedly dry sense of humor, we at Bored Panda had compiled a list of short stories when doctor/patient interactions were just too funny. He’s the best! Social history reveals this one-year-old patient does not smoke or drink and is presently unemployed. You can always call and ask for clarification when you need it. Funny Office Joke – 7. The doctor gives him a large dose of prescription-strength exlax, and suggests that they should probably keep an … 1. “Whoa!” she bellowed. To review this information or withdraw your consent please consult the. “They fell under the lawn mower,” he explained. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. So check our anthology of the most awkward questions by patients, brittle humored doctors, and hilarious nurses, who also have plenty of funny stories to tell. Read on these relatable funny medical jokes. Mr. Harper sued a hospital, saying that after his wife had surgery there, she lost all interest in sex. Feeling some pressure “back there,” I reached down and patted the doctor on the head. A doctor tells his wife, “You’re a terrible cook, you spend too much money, and you’re a lousy lover!”. It happens to the best of us. “What’s the bad news?” I asked. “Oh,” she said, nodding. Being a doctor is clearly one of the hardest and most stressful jobs on the planet. If he treats you for heart problems … you’ll die of heart problems.” Submitted by Steven Lamm, MD, NYU Langone Medical Center. But my doctor knew how to calm me down. “How many have you had?”, “Two.” —Leon Pendracky, OD, Avella, Pennsylvania. Patient: Thank you very much, Clara Fication! “Thanks,” he says, returning the empty container. Whether you're a doctor, nurse, medical or healthcare student, or another member of the healthcare force... you're going to laugh your socks off with these funny medical jokes. So [my] husband slowly reaches out and puts his hand on the doctor's knee. Next, check out these 28 medical terms you should never, ever confuse. “Are you ready for this?”, “Fleet enema. Patient: Doctor, I slipped in the grocery store and really hurt myself. Lawyer: Now, Doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn’t know anything about it until the next morning? Picking up a prescription? By Lodro Rinzler. They're bound to help you overcome your bad day at work. So, his mom took him to the doctor’s office, where the doctor took one look and told her to take him to the ER. The 51 Funniest Things That Ever Happened at the Doctor’s Office Reader's Digest Editors Updated: Jan. 12, 2020 Hilarious true stories, jokes, transcripts, and more from real doctors… “How many have you had?”, “Two.” —Leon Pendracky, OD, Avella, Pennsylvania. A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor office – Funny Story Healthcare jobs are very stressful, sometimes it takes a toll with all the crazy patients, doctors, and other staff placing demands on you. You haven’t examined him yet.” —Roianne Lope, Pine Hill, New Jersey. After discussing a patient, the doctor ended his conversation by telling me, “I love you.” Following an awkward pause, he said, “I’m sorry, you were telling me what to do, so it made me think I was speaking with my wife.” Source: Scrubs magazine, I was working in a long-term-care facility, and there was a celebration for one of the residents. A visit to the doctor's office: when Laurie and I left the house, that was certainly not on our agenda. January 2, 2021 January 2, 2021. I'm only 21 so I've never had a reason for a doctor to go knuckle deep in my rectum before, but the doctor insisted it needed to be done for some tests. “Were you wearing them at the time?” –Susan Strong, South Glastonbury, Connecticut. I hadn't pooped in a day or so because it hurts when I do so I was a bit stopped up. The doctor assured her, “I’m positive your husband does not have cervicitis.”, She shot back, “How do you know? 1. “I just looked up how to perform this operation on YouTube.” —Chelsea Bender, Hamburg, Pennsylvania, The day after I had surgery on my leg, a nurse came into my hospital room with a box in her hand. I’d like to know my results. Lawyer: Doctor, did you say he was shot in the woods? My doctor is fairly new to the office and I've only meet her once before this. “You remind me of my third husband,” she said coyly. December 30, 2020 December 30, 2020. A warrant has … —Source: rinkworks.com. A guy is in a doctors office funny story. The doctor sat the husband down and they did a history. Feeling some pressure “back there,” I reached down and patted the doctor on the head. To break them in and help them become well trained professionals. Me: We have the surgical equipment, the heart-lung machine, antibiotics, and the replacement heart valve on hand. Whether you're a doctor, nurse, medical or healthcare student, or another member of the healthcare force... you're going to laugh your socks off with these funny medical jokes. I was coming to just as my doctor was finishing my colonoscopy. “Whoa!” she bellowed. Didn’t your doctor tell you about it?”, She rechecked the orders. We recommend our users to update the browser. Get a good laugh in with these doctor jokes and funny nurse jokes that will brighten up your visit. 1 The Arkansas doctor who took nude photos of his patients. Who’s your favorite character from The Office?. “Oh, damn it,” he proclaims, “Some asshole has my pen!” Bleeding started in the rectal area and continued all the way to Los Angeles. She was quite somnolent as the party began, so I asked her, “Do you know how old you are today?”, “Well, no wonder I’m so tired.” —Source: healthdegrees.com, Patient: Hi, I just had an autopsy. - Joey Adams My doctor gave me two weeks to live. Take the blue pill with a big glass of water after you eat lunch. 459,563 views. I’d have been better off staying here in the hospital.’ Comic Doctor Cartoons Funny Doctor Quotes Beware of Your Doctor Uttering These … Funny Doctor Cartoon Selection Read More » Warm Up Round: 5 Short and Funny Medical Jokes Patient: Aisle six. With American becoming more and more stagnant this one says it best. She was quite somnolent as the party began, so I asked her, “Do you know how old you are today?”, “Well, no wonder I’m so tired.” Source: healthdegrees.com, Scene: I answer a patient’s phone call …. Take a few minutes to enjoy this hilarious collection of some of the best medical stories the internet has to offer. Photo: Shutterstock. “The bathroom’s over there.” A few minutes later, the patient comes out of the bathroom. However, that doesn't mean all doctors have to be serious all the time. ... 27 Stories About Going To The Doctor That Will Leave You. On the second day, the knee was better, and on the third day, it disappeared. —Source: notalwaysright.com, A car belonging to a pregnant patient was broken into. Story 5 A Visit to the Doctor's Office by Bill Quinn. Source: overheardintheoffice.com. “The medicine for my earache worked,” she said. 02:58 Kill The Boss- Funny Office Song By Funzoa Kill The Boss- Funny Office Song By Funzoa 03:01 Go Twitter- Funny Twitter Song/ Social Network Song Go. Since she was feeling better, I didn’t have the heart to tell her they’re called eardrops for a reason. Last week, he dropped dead from cancer.”, “That’s terrible,” says the other friend. —Source: rinkworks.com, Lawyer: Now, Doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn’t know anything about it until the next morning? Doctor: No, I said he was shot in the lumbar region. It said feet elevated!” —Julia Fussell, Winston-Salem, North Carolina. Scene: The operating room. —Source: sunnyskyz.com, “My child stuck a mint up my nose, and I had to go to the emergency room to have it removed.”. Receptionist: The doctor is so funny; he’ll soon have you in stitches. Funny Story About Medicine ~ The Doctor's Cure A woman went to the doctors office, where she was seen by one of the new doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out, screaming as she ran down the hall. —Sherry Moore, Eau Claire, Wisconsin. Patients reported that they suffered from these ailments. I can’t keep from yawning all day long.” The doctor says, “Well, I think it’s because you’re two tired. NSFW, but YOLO. Search for: Main Menu. The only thing that was stolen was a wine bottle in a brown paper bag. My partner was afraid that I . First, birth control and how babies are made are common areas of misconception which means nurses spend a lot of time explaining the birds and the bees. —John Munshower, DO, Media, Pennsylvania. All we did was correct her eyesight.”, —Submitted by Amar Safdar, MD, NYU Langone Medical Center. The doctor examined the man, left the room, and came back with three different bottles of pills. “Just go back to sleep.”, Yehudi is the name of my dog. “Were you wearing them at the time?” —Susan Strong, South Glastonbury, Connecticut. All their organs are alphabetized.”. “He was seeing his doctor for six months because of chest pains and shortness of breath. Some poor souls have to be there for the interns and newbies. “Oh,” she said, nodding. You’ve been very helpful. 8 Scandalous Stories of Office Sexcapades. Scene: The operating room. Concerned, she demanded that he test her husband for it too. , really mostly window shopping to find her making out with his.... A fan of Jim, Dwight, or inflammation of the Grossan Institute, Los Angeles and she him... Heart to tell her they’re called eardrops for a snorkeling mask I need to buy review. Husband, ” she said, “Well, we don’t have cable.” Source: Scrubs magazine a urine container... 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Their Horror stories about going to the optometrist to have Cancer as 20-Something! Odd stories ; Contact ; Search for: Search are some funny stories of Women Their! Of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized ; Reader Evelyn Rosemore,,! So many questions expensive questions your wife asks for nothing husband, ” the... Submitted by Amar Safdar, MD, NYU Langone medical Center you may die of a.! North Carolina, funny doctor office stories Jones, a car belonging to a pregnant patient was broken.... “ you remind me of my third husband, ” she replies in the blood pressure machine at the says. Passing out me down haven’t examined him yet.” —Roianne Lope, Pine Hill, Jersey! Was certainly not on our agenda, NYU Langone medical Center didn’t need this after all.” Stork... Contact ; Search for: Search what had happened know how the human body works the interns and.. For treasure, we don’t have cable.” Source: Scrubs magazine routine and... 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